Dad was diagnosed with cancer three days ago. I could easily focus on the negatives because that comes so naturally. But I am confronted with the precious frailty of the human life and the scramble to hang on to whatever shred of sanity I can.
There is good meant to come from every struggle in life. Dads diagnosis has brought the family closer together and strengthed our Faith. The other day Fr. Reed brought the most perfect gift to my father before he went to surgery, Jesus in the Eucharist.
I have found a huge network of support in the community I live with and the many beautiful Daughters of Charity not to mention the people at my fabulous work site.
I won’t say I’ve handled this news like a powerful superwoman. I am human too. I had one of those always welcome public cries the morning after I found out at Mass. I was blessed to have friends present to give me tissues and listen to my freak out!
I have found that it feels better to pray for peace. Acceptance of God’s plan. I also find myself praying for all the hands involved in the care of my dad, that they have the energy and strength to be the best they can be since I am not there.
I am a caregiver, sometimes I try to deny it but it is so much a part of who I am. I have found myself trying to take all the needs and burdens of my family on my shoulders. This has made me evaluate my own needs and burdens which calls to mind the scripture passage, “for My yoke is easy and My burden light.” Matthew 11:30 I have found joy and peace in the love of my God. He nourishes me, cares for my soul, and holds me close when I cry to Him for comfort. “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12:9 I’ve started to embrace the weak state I find myself in these days because that is where He can take over and shine through me into the people I serve, into my family, into the people I meet longing for love and acceptance.
People ask me how I’m dealing. I’m at a wonderful place where I see how blessed we are and how God will always provide for those He loves and those who love Him.
I trust in You my God. All my imperfections are in front of You. Continue to lead the way.